"Children have a drive to love other people and to be a contribution to the people around them. Misbehavior in children is an attempt to communicate, when all else has failed." - The Kids Project brochure
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
The Stalking Is Love!
There's a status meme going around teh facebooks worded like this or very close to it:
"My promise to my children: I am not your friend. I am your mother. I will stalk you, flip out on you, lecture you, drive you insane, and hunt you down like a bloodhound when necessary because I love you. When you understand that, I will know you are a responsible adult. You will never find someone who loves, prays, and cares more for you than I do. Repost if you are a mom!."
Rather than analyze the wrong, I'd like to share the rewordings I discovered in the mommy blogosphere, starting with the one I posted:
"
My promise to my children. I am your friend. I am your mom. I will protect you, listen to you, respect you, support you, be your strongest advocate & give you wings to fly when you are ready because I LOVE YOU. You will NEVER find someone who loves, prays, and cares about you more than I do." (LINK)
"My promise to my children ~ I LOVE being your friend! Being both friend and Mother is a wonderful experience. I will hang out with you when you feel like it, talk when you want, and listen when you need me to, drive you anywhere you need or want to go, wish you sweet dreams every night and miss you like crazy when you're away because I LOVE YOU! Someday, I hope you do find someone who loves, prays, cares and worries about you more than I do, and when you do, marry him! Repost if you are a parent and agree.♥" (LINK)
"My promise to my kids – I am not only your friend, I am your Mentor, Leader, and Guide. I will always work hard to keep our relationship strong. I hope that you will always trust and respect me, but I know these are qualities that must work both ways. I hope you will forgive me when I flip out on you, as I believe this is unacceptable behavior, but I am human and may give in to my primitive brain sometimes. I will give you unsolicited advice and work with you to correct any behavior I feel needs correcting, but ultimately it is your life and your decision. I hope you trust that I am always working in your best interest and my goal is for you to become a responsible, happy, and successful adult. I will have faith in my ability to teach you how to make wise decisions so that I don’t have to stalk you. I trust our communication will be open and honest. If you ever need me, I will be there and I hope you will never be afraid to ask me for help. I will always have your back and support you no matter what, because I LOVE YOU and I already know you are amazing! Re-Post if you are a parent that does things a little differently…" (LINK)
"A message to my children: I am blessed to be your mother and honored to be your friend. I will always be there for you, supporting you and providing a secure, loving base. As long as your safety is not compromised, I will trust you to make decisions, even when I disagree. I will offer my advice when appropriate, but always remember in any conversation listening is more important than talking. I promise to be one person in your life on whom you can depend unconditionally. I know that you will grow into a content, responsible adult who respects others because you have been shown respect. I will care for your needs and pray for you daily because I love you. Repost to show how much you care about your children." (LINK)
Sunday, July 10, 2011
The Kids Attend Their First Gay Pride Parade
It was small, but they threw candy, so the kids liked it!
Waiting with friends
Global AIDS awareness
Baby contemplates the loud noises
There were several churches that participated. This was heartwarming!!!
Not a Pride Parade without queens.
Deirdre and her buddy
Dancing to the live music and chasing bubbles
If you can't expose your ginormous breast here, where CAN you do it???
Thursday, July 07, 2011
"Choose Joy. Call Bullshit On The Rest."
"If you are still using compulsion and emotional/physical coersion (sic) to ensure that your child is “well behaved” and “fitting in to society”, consider they might grow up to be an intolerant, unfeeling blogger who advocates hitting young kids.
And if you are trying to break the cycle into more peaceful attached parenting at the price of bucking the system, consider you will deal with douchebags who aren’t afraid to bully you or your child to get you to stop. So find some good supportive friends, muster up your courage, and be awesome! Choose joy. Call bullshit on the rest."
- "Bullies Are Bullied First. Usually By People Trying To Be 'Good Parents.'" - Posted by Tiff in Our freeplaylife
"When the parent-blaming child-shaming folk say “I treat kids like people by expecting them to act like it” what they’re really saying is “I expect kids to act like adults”, which boils down to the belief that only adults are people. Because if you actually recognize that children are in fact persons, then you would be able to see that yes, actually, people do do those things in public, and the proof is dancing right in front of you.
...You might doubt the status of children as an oppressed class. There is much I can use to support this assertion, but simplest and most starkly is this: in the United States of America, and in too many other countries (any would be too many), physical assault on a child is considered a parent’s legally-protected right, often explicitly granted. You might quibble about whether any given act of violence is “assault”, that it’s not really “abuse” unless it leaves a mark for more than a day, or breaks the skin, or breaks a bone, or whatever line you wish you use to delineate “acceptable” from “abusive”, but the fact remains that it is legal for an adult to hit a child against their will, and it is not legal to hit another adult the same way. Physical violence enacted on children’s bodies to “discipline” them is a mark of their status as not-persons, as things, in culture’s conception.
...What does it mean, exactly, to honor their personhood? It means simply that we start with the radical idea that children are people: that they have the right to bodily integrity; that their needs are no less important than ours, that their desires are no less worthy than ours; that their feelings matter, that their ideas matter, that they matter; that they should be respected for who they are, not just valued (or devalued) for what they do for us.
From here, many things become obvious: we do not hit children, because we do not hit people. We do not cut their genitals, because we do not perform unnecessary and harmful amputation on people without their consent. We do not shun them and segregate them away from us, because separate is not equal. We do not expect them to act like adults, because they have the right to act like children."
- "Dancing between the tables: on the personhood of children"
And if you are trying to break the cycle into more peaceful attached parenting at the price of bucking the system, consider you will deal with douchebags who aren’t afraid to bully you or your child to get you to stop. So find some good supportive friends, muster up your courage, and be awesome! Choose joy. Call bullshit on the rest."
- "Bullies Are Bullied First. Usually By People Trying To Be 'Good Parents.'" - Posted by Tiff in Our freeplaylife
"When the parent-blaming child-shaming folk say “I treat kids like people by expecting them to act like it” what they’re really saying is “I expect kids to act like adults”, which boils down to the belief that only adults are people. Because if you actually recognize that children are in fact persons, then you would be able to see that yes, actually, people do do those things in public, and the proof is dancing right in front of you.
...You might doubt the status of children as an oppressed class. There is much I can use to support this assertion, but simplest and most starkly is this: in the United States of America, and in too many other countries (any would be too many), physical assault on a child is considered a parent’s legally-protected right, often explicitly granted. You might quibble about whether any given act of violence is “assault”, that it’s not really “abuse” unless it leaves a mark for more than a day, or breaks the skin, or breaks a bone, or whatever line you wish you use to delineate “acceptable” from “abusive”, but the fact remains that it is legal for an adult to hit a child against their will, and it is not legal to hit another adult the same way. Physical violence enacted on children’s bodies to “discipline” them is a mark of their status as not-persons, as things, in culture’s conception.
...What does it mean, exactly, to honor their personhood? It means simply that we start with the radical idea that children are people: that they have the right to bodily integrity; that their needs are no less important than ours, that their desires are no less worthy than ours; that their feelings matter, that their ideas matter, that they matter; that they should be respected for who they are, not just valued (or devalued) for what they do for us.
From here, many things become obvious: we do not hit children, because we do not hit people. We do not cut their genitals, because we do not perform unnecessary and harmful amputation on people without their consent. We do not shun them and segregate them away from us, because separate is not equal. We do not expect them to act like adults, because they have the right to act like children."
- "Dancing between the tables: on the personhood of children"
Monday, July 04, 2011
Baby In a Back Carry
This is how Moira spends about 1/3 of her day. I HIGHLY recommend learning to carry a baby this way. Now that I've mastered doing it without help, life is MUCH easier. Moira gets very excited and giggles when I start to put her on my back. Bryan recently tried it and he loves it, too.
Sunday, July 03, 2011
Gaining Weight On Oatmeal and Losing Weight On Butter
Remember last year during my pregnancy when I was all like, screw you, dietician, there's no way I'm going to stop eating oatmeal, I'm a rebel like that?
Well, he was right and I was wrong.
After Moira was born, oatmeal became my go-to meal. I had it practically every day for breakfast and lunch, because I could microwave it for just a few minutes with some rice milk and be full, Plus, it increases your milk supply, so I was gloriously full of milk.
Over a few months, something alarming happened. MY skin started to FOLD OVER OTHER skin. I'm a big girl, you know that. But even while big I've been shapely. Not anymore. Flesh started to pour out of my bra. Tummy rolls folded over my c section scar and jiggled when I walked. My weight went up to higher than it's ever been, even more than all three pregnancies. 230 pounds, my friends. The most I weighed in any pregnancy is 220.
I COULD FEEL MY CHIN ON MY NECK.
All from oatmeal. No, really. Dinner was usually the same old same old. I wasn't eating extra dessert. Just oatmeal.
It was about this time that some of my friends started eating high protein low carb diets called Paleo diets, Caveman diets, Primal diets, Hunter-Gatherer diets. All of these names refer to eating in a way that helps keep blood sugar low and energy high. I'm sure it is the bane of Vegans and Vegetarians everywhere. And I don't believe that any ONE diet is right for everyone.
However, I tried it, and not even 100%, mind you, and I lost 13 pounds over 5-6 weeks. I still have more fatty skin than I want, but my double chin is gone. Everyone tells me they can see it in my face.
I replaced my oatmeal with "No-Oat Meal" and went from coke to diet coke. I started eating nut and fruit bars instead of granola bars when I took the kids out. THAT IS IT. That's the main change I made.
Because eating this way is expensive, I went back to eating "normal" this last month. My jeans have stopped fitting again.
So, now I'm making more of a commitment, and convinced Bryan to join me for a while. Less bread and pasta, more meat and vegetables and berries (berries have lower sugar content than other fruits). The idea is to eat the way our caveman ancestors did - animals, fruits and vegetables that could be found in the wild, seeds and nuts. Lots of fat, lots of fresh.
Which brings me to the butter. (Click Here for a run-down on why cultured butter from grass-fed cows is good for you)
A friend of mine mentioned on Facebook that she has a butter smoothie in the morning. This sounds disgusting to me. But, her husband has lost 30 pounds eating this way. I know because she posted a picture of his shirtless six pack self to show how awesome this way of eating has been. She posted the recipe for her smoothie on her blog just for me (CLICK HERE). Yep, that's a stick and a half of butter she puts into that smoothie every morning, sometimes twice a day. She admits that it is expensive - organic butter, egg yolks, kefir, organic frozen berries - but she feels less depressed and more cheerful on the days she has it.
Bryan and I tried it for the first time two days ago. It was...buttery. It takes some getting used to, and I only used half a stick. Today it was even more buttery, a whole stick, in fact, and it left a film on the inside of my blender. BUT - it was very filling. After that smoothie, it was a while before I felt hungry again. I expected it to make me feel sluggish or at least nauseous, but it didn't. I felt good.
I've made butter before with the kids - you have them shake the jar and roll it around to keep them occupied while you cook the holiday meal - so I think we'll start making our own cultured buttered with some local cream.
Well, he was right and I was wrong.
After Moira was born, oatmeal became my go-to meal. I had it practically every day for breakfast and lunch, because I could microwave it for just a few minutes with some rice milk and be full, Plus, it increases your milk supply, so I was gloriously full of milk.
Over a few months, something alarming happened. MY skin started to FOLD OVER OTHER skin. I'm a big girl, you know that. But even while big I've been shapely. Not anymore. Flesh started to pour out of my bra. Tummy rolls folded over my c section scar and jiggled when I walked. My weight went up to higher than it's ever been, even more than all three pregnancies. 230 pounds, my friends. The most I weighed in any pregnancy is 220.
I COULD FEEL MY CHIN ON MY NECK.
All from oatmeal. No, really. Dinner was usually the same old same old. I wasn't eating extra dessert. Just oatmeal.
It was about this time that some of my friends started eating high protein low carb diets called Paleo diets, Caveman diets, Primal diets, Hunter-Gatherer diets. All of these names refer to eating in a way that helps keep blood sugar low and energy high. I'm sure it is the bane of Vegans and Vegetarians everywhere. And I don't believe that any ONE diet is right for everyone.
However, I tried it, and not even 100%, mind you, and I lost 13 pounds over 5-6 weeks. I still have more fatty skin than I want, but my double chin is gone. Everyone tells me they can see it in my face.
I replaced my oatmeal with "No-Oat Meal" and went from coke to diet coke. I started eating nut and fruit bars instead of granola bars when I took the kids out. THAT IS IT. That's the main change I made.
Because eating this way is expensive, I went back to eating "normal" this last month. My jeans have stopped fitting again.
So, now I'm making more of a commitment, and convinced Bryan to join me for a while. Less bread and pasta, more meat and vegetables and berries (berries have lower sugar content than other fruits). The idea is to eat the way our caveman ancestors did - animals, fruits and vegetables that could be found in the wild, seeds and nuts. Lots of fat, lots of fresh.
Which brings me to the butter. (Click Here for a run-down on why cultured butter from grass-fed cows is good for you)
A friend of mine mentioned on Facebook that she has a butter smoothie in the morning. This sounds disgusting to me. But, her husband has lost 30 pounds eating this way. I know because she posted a picture of his shirtless six pack self to show how awesome this way of eating has been. She posted the recipe for her smoothie on her blog just for me (CLICK HERE). Yep, that's a stick and a half of butter she puts into that smoothie every morning, sometimes twice a day. She admits that it is expensive - organic butter, egg yolks, kefir, organic frozen berries - but she feels less depressed and more cheerful on the days she has it.
Bryan and I tried it for the first time two days ago. It was...buttery. It takes some getting used to, and I only used half a stick. Today it was even more buttery, a whole stick, in fact, and it left a film on the inside of my blender. BUT - it was very filling. After that smoothie, it was a while before I felt hungry again. I expected it to make me feel sluggish or at least nauseous, but it didn't. I felt good.
I've made butter before with the kids - you have them shake the jar and roll it around to keep them occupied while you cook the holiday meal - so I think we'll start making our own cultured buttered with some local cream.
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